outwait outrun outwit


an archive of pleasures, wounds, sublimations
& other curiosities :: profile


Today I subsist on buttered scones, endless cups of coffee, sliced bananas in yogurt, Medjool dates, and rollies smoked in between Twitter and writing. Tonight, dinner is mushy peas, steamed potatoes, stewed carrot and parsnip, piled around lean wild duck shot by a hunter who dropped it off in the pub, feathered and still warm. I'm grateful for a glass of wine and chat with my ill mother-in-law.

After reading about Trump wanting to revoke birthright citizenship by executive order, I turned on my internet blocker for social media, an act of self-care by an American citizen born to Cambodian refugees, non-citizens at the time of my birth. It's internally damaging, this daily assault on human rights everywhere, a further cordoning off to the right to life and liberty by the far-right. The personal is political, yeah?

Anyways, I'm looking forward to scaring people tomorrow in the castle's tableau of gory ghouls; a sublimation of the desire to devour my enemies. Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc! On Thursday, I will take a train to the east and meet up with my friends to look at art in Dublin. I will try to finish Austerlitz by that other lover of train trips, W.G. Sebald: "We take almost all the decisive steps in our lives as a result of slight inner adjustments of which we are barely conscious."


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